[	Current Location	|	my room	]
[	mood	|	crappy	]
[	music	|	wild horses by natasha bedingfield	]

Today i tried so hard to stick to a strict diet. i woke up and all was fine, i had a cup of black coffee and an all bran bar (130 cals, its alot i know but i thought that i was going to be able to handle that) when i got to school i was hanging out with a friend and was hungry and noticed my mom put another all bran bar in my purse, so i ate it! then i got home drank a glass of juice and ate corn nuts with a friend. then i ate chicken fried rice for dinner. oh god. how did i let myself go so out of control. i toldd my mom i would eat 1000 cals a day (so she wouldnt get suspicious) but i dont know how i'm going to do that without feeling like shit. i CANT do that. i need to lose weight by december. i will starve myself til then if i have to. if my will  will let me. oh god im really hating myself right now, i've gotta go

xo stacey